Well, not really -- but, look, it's not completely out of the question. The rest of the Boston Phoenix staff is off on a summer picnic today, boating out to the Harbor Islands en masse for several hours of reflection and contemplation. We haven't heard from them in a few hours, so it's entirely possible that they've been eaten by crocodiles.

LISTEN UP
5 Years Ago
June 27, 2003 | Michael Bronski explained the meaning behind the Blessed Virgin Mary's appearance on a window at Milton Hospital.
"...Obviously, the BVM has a message for us today. The trick is in deciphering it. Fortunately, her appearance in Milton is easy to interpret.

Let's talk about street art, shall we? "Street art," as a term, is so broad (as is the concept it represents), and there are so many different types of street art out there that it's easy to forget that some street art - a lot of it, in fact - has a point. Sometimes that point is direct and profound, and sometimes it's open to interpretation.

SLEAZY DOES IT
5 Years Ago
June 20, 2003 | Carly Carioli profiled hip-hop baiting rappers of Gravy Train.
“Gravy Train...are a quartet of three self-described ‘rap bitches’ (Chunx, Funx, and Drunx) and one gay boy (Hunx) who apply riot grrrl’s postfeminist mandate to the Fat Beats and Bra Straps (Rhino) girlschool of ’80s hip-hop.

All this seems so long ago now, doesn't it?

When we think back to where we were as fans a year ago coming off a lost season, it really seems all the more amazing that this team just won the NBA title. Really, we'd love to say we saw this coming all along. Unfortunately for us our thoughts on the subject are on the record.

(A little late for the traditional 8 a.m. start time, but feel free to pick it up at Episode 9.)

Episode 1 - Telemachus. Breakfast. Shave. Take a dip at Carson Beach in Southie.

God, he said quietly. Isn't the sea what Algy calls it: a grey sweet mother? The snotgreen sea. The scrotumtightening sea.

THEY’RE STRETCHY PANTS, DUH
5 Years Ago
June 13, 2003 | Peter Keough wondered why Bruce Banner’s pants stay on when he undergoes transformation into the Hulk.
“To his credit, director Ang Lee broaches this question on his own. ‘People always ask, including myself, how come the pants always stay on? I wanted my Hulk to be naked.

THEY’RE STRETCHY PANTS, DUH
5 Years Ago
June 13, 2003 | Peter Keough wondered why Bruce Banner’s pants stay on when he undergoes transformation into the Hulk.
“To his credit, director Ang Lee broaches this question on his own. ‘People always ask, including myself, how come the pants always stay on? I wanted my Hulk to be naked.

THEY’RE STRETCHY PANTS, DUH
5 Years Ago
June 13, 2003 | Peter Keough wondered why Bruce Banner’s pants stay on when he undergoes transformation into the Hulk.
“To his credit, director Ang Lee broaches this question on his own. ‘People always ask, including myself, how come the pants always stay on? I wanted my Hulk to be naked.

STEP OFF
5 years ago
June 6, 2003 | Susan Ryan-Vollmar shared her reactions to the Catholic Church’s attack on gay marriages (including her own) from the altar.
"I didn’t think I’d get worked up about it. When I read reports last week that the Catholic Church’s four bishops in Massachusetts were directing parish priests to issue a call to arms against same-sex marriage from the altar this past weekend, I wasn’t so much angry as flabbergasted.

It only took making the NBA Finals, but finally it seems the Celtics are the talk of this town.

The Finals begin tonight with the Celtics taking on the Lakers, a team with whom (as you may have heard by now) there's been some historic bad blood - Bird-Magic, Russell-Wilt, McHale-Rambis etc. That stuff makes good copy, but ultimately we prefer to focus on the here and now.

We've smacked the Boston Police Department around a bit for its inability to solve a majority of the city's homicides, but let's give credit where credit is due: when it comes to unsanctioned, bare-knuckled, backroom beat-downs, the BPD can make a claim that no other department can: Boston's Finest have a record of 1-0 against Kimbo Slice.