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| HatchetA classic slasher eye roller September 5,
 2007 6:35:14 PM 
|   PRETTY YOUNG THINGS: It's be a lot scarier if any of the characters were likeable.
 |  Local director Adam Green’s eye roller follows the classic slasher formula: one misshapen maybe-man/maybe-ghost stalks a group of pretty young things and rips their limbs off, twists their heads off, and pulls their guts out with generous plumes of blood spray and strewn entrails. Here, they’re in the Louisiana swamps, after a sulky Ben (Joel Moore), who sports a Newbury Comics T the whole movie, aborts his Mardi Gras plans and opts instead for a haunted-swamp tour. The simple, effective backstory propels the carnage, and the cast is littered with horror-film vets: the dude who played Freddy Krueger, the guy who played the Candyman, one of the Blair Witch Project-eers, and Kane Hodder a/k/a Jason Voorhees from the Friday the 13th franchise as the monster-man who took a hatchet in the forehead. The slashery satisfies, but despite a few laughs and tense moments, it’d be a lot scarier if any of the characters was likable.
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