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| BratzOh my god, this movie totally sucks August 7,
 2007 12:42:31 PM 
| VIDEO: Watch the trailer for Bratz.
 |  So like, oh my God. You guys? This movie? Totally sucks. A paean to consumerism in all its forms, Bratz is based on those slutty dolls people inexplicably buy for their kids. You know, the ones that look like hookers? In this live-action film directed by Disney Channel stalwart Sean McNamara, four Bratz come to shallow, materialistic life. Jade, Yasmin, Cloe, and Sasha are bff’s 4-eva until they hit high school and get sucked into the cliques run by the power-hungry principal’s daughter. She’s so evil, she’s even rigged the school talent show. How do our flighty young heroines fight back? By shopping, of course. There is no problem, it seems, a new tube top and mini-skirt can’t fix. If only that were true — I could have hit Forever 21 after the depressingly well-attended screening and shopped until my will to live came back.
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												Doesn't kick it soon enough 
												All funked up 
												Better than generic holiday fare 
												Introducing reggaetón 
												Crass and crude and mostly annoying humor 
												The legendary playwright is better 
												Predictability ensues 
												A miserable family to watch 
												 A familiar girl-power tale
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 | Ego supersizedAn uncomfortable horror/comedy hybridDelivering the goods, especially if you like to watch a man submerged in acidThe death of a cityReality TV has not killed the video starNot original "original" screenplayNo catharsis here, just soft piano keysA $25 million dollar budget and a handheld cameraA charmerBilly the Kid has trouble making it through high school
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