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Mooninites cripple Boston

And rock your face off
By CARLY CARIOLI  |  February 1, 2007

"I hope you can see this, Boston, because I'm doing it as hard as I can"

Boston, 2007 = Grovers Mill, 1938.

For those of you not familiar with Aqua Teen Hunger Force , the Mooninites are a race of video-game aliens who attempt, albeit inefectually, to wreak mayhem on the world. (They are completely awesome, though, because Schooly D does their theme song.) The joke is that the Mooninites always fail to do any real harm.

Except, that is, in Boston.

Roads and rivers were closed , businesses sent employees home, traffic was snarled, and the bomb squad even detonated a " sophisticated electronic device " when a bunch of lite-brite boards -- all bearing a peculiar resemblance to a certain Adult Swim cartoon, which also happened to be plastered across billboards in Allston and I-93 -- were uncovered by Boston's crack anti-terrorism units . The BPD, which has had trouble  the past couple years solving real crimes , wasted no time in rounding up the Arlington artist who was an accomplice to this grave deed. The state AG is promising lawsuits, and lots of them. Sleep easy, Massachoochians, your blessed city is safe . . . from evil cartoons.

Just to make you feel worse, the "devices" were also scattered around NY and LA. Nobody freaked out there. Our guess? Something to do with this new-fangled contraption called "YouTube." Apparently this city's never heard of it. At least not over at the Globe, which posted a grip of bomb-scare stories  (this just after the boring broadsheet fell for another local hoax -- the one about Theo Epstein getting married at a New York hot dog stand.Oops.)

Here's the video of people planting "bombs" . . .

Now for something really scary. Not only can Mooninites reduce our city toa gibbering, paranoid gob of hysterical bitches. . . they can also rock your face off. (Replace "Uncle Cliff" in the following clip with "Deval Patrick," then see if you can keep from crying.)

Oh shit, here they come again!

  Topics: News Features , Baseball , Sports , AL East Division ,  More more >
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Mooninites cripple Boston
Seriously Hilarious, I want one for my wall where can I get one (not ebay) Is there any still up? Any on got one in a dumpster? email me with details,
By Kaycee on 02/01/2007 at 2:14:56
Mooninites cripple Boston
Dear City of Boston, I hope you know what total baboons this makes you look like to the rest of the U.S. We can't stop laughing at the general stupidity for your state and local governments reaction to lite-brites on the mooninites. Had no one in your government ever heard of ATHF? No one? Pathetic.
By billy on 02/01/2007 at 4:06:29
Mooninites cripple Boston
My favorite part is how the ATHF billboard in Brighton, that looks the same as these "bombs", is RIGHT ACROSS FROM THE POLICE STATION.
By Jamo on 02/01/2007 at 4:14:10
Mooninites cripple Boston
this was hysterical. the mooninites finally wreak havoc! too bad it was in boston.
By prometheus66 on 02/01/2007 at 10:22:43
Mooninites cripple Boston
Menino, meet Mooninites. //
By xombievox on 02/02/2007 at 1:39:33
Mooninites cripple Boston
I do not go to Boston because it sucks. Just for the Citys' reaction to this matter, I realize how smart I was to stay away. I am sure if it was a "Boston Red Sox" LOGO it never would have made the paper. How gay can that city get. Get over it.
By Mercedes on 02/03/2007 at 10:58:18

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