BROOKLYN LEEBrooklyn Lee renounced her rural home in Ohio at 18, and came to Massachusetts in search of an existence less mundane. However, with her damasked countenance, she could pass for one of our native Irish lasses. Lee passed many enjoyable and improving hours giving oral comfort to a certain night-club manager in his automobile (if you were the lucky chap, she says, "Call me"), but has yet to commit herself to matrimony.
WHAT'S YOUR PERFECT ST. VALENTINE'S DAY?
Ideally, I'd like a nice dinner out, maybe see a show or something. Keep it simple.
AND AFTERWARD?
V-Day is a three-orgasm-minimum occasion.
WOULD YOU REFUSE CUPID'S MEMBER IN THE HEAT OF PASSION?
Mythical creatures are always welcome in my bedroom.
SHOULD A GENTLEMAN WANT TO ENSURE HIS WELCOME, WHAT TRINKETS SHOULD HE PROFFER?
A Bentley with flat black paint. Stylish, yet reasonably priced.
IF A YOUNG LADY ABHORS THE FLAVOR OF A MAN'S FLUIDS, SHOULD SHE NONETHELESS PARTAKE OF THIS DELICACY ON ST. VALENTINE'S DAY?
There are still women out there who don't swallow?
IF A GENTLEMAN WERE TO GIVE YOU A PRESENT THAT DID NOT PLEASE YOU, HOW WOULD YOU PUNISH THE UNLUCKY FELLOW?
I'd let him fuck me, but I wouldn't let him cum.
HOW MIGHT ONE PREVENT DULLNESS IN THE BOUDOIR?
Ask your partner for a list of five realistic fantasies, and surprise them by making one of them a reality.
TO WHAT USE WOULD YOU PUT CUPID'S ARROW?
It'd make a suitable anal probe.
Scott Fayner doesn't buy chocolate for his two Valentines, because they're dogs and it would probably kill them. He can be reached at fayneralmighty@gmail.com.