The 100 worst lyrics of all time - Home Entertainment

MacArthur Park by Donna Summers --"Someone left the cake out in the rain, I don't think I could take it, `cause it took so long to bake it, And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no!"

POSTED BY yo momma AT 04/21/06 8:45 AM

Genesis (with Peter Gabriel), "Dancing With The Moonlit Knight" -- Follow on ! A Round Table-talking down we go / You're the show ! / Off we go with: You play the hobbyhorse I'll play the fool / We'll tease the bull Ringing round & loud, loud & round

POSTED BY Veector AT 04/21/06 10:12 AM

No J.Lo? "I give my song to the DJ/'Cuz my song he's got to play" makes me want to scream when I hear it!

POSTED BY mistymay AT 04/21/06 10:54 AM

Just pick a song, any song, off of System of a Down's "Toxicity" "Prison Song": All research and successful drug policy show That treatment should be increased, And law enforcement decreased, While abolishing mandatory minimum sentences, All research and successful drug policy show That treatment should be increased, And law enforcement decreased, While abolishing mandatory minimum sentences. "Science": Science fails to recognize the single most Potent element of human existence letting the reigns go to the unfolding Is faith, faith, faith, faith. Science has failed our world Science has failed our Mother Earth. "Needles": Cause you, My tapeworm tells me what to do, You, My tapeworm tells me where to go, Pull the tapeworm out of your ass, Hey Pull the tapeworm out of your ass, Hey Pull the tapeworm out of your ass, Hey Pull the tapeworm out of your ass, Hey

POSTED BY eugene AT 04/21/06 11:41 AM

Lovin' the suggestions so far . . .

POSTED BY R_Stewart AT 04/21/06 11:45 AM

Hey, newsflash to ReliantK: the sun doesn't rise over the Pacific Ocean (in the US). Last I checked the sun rises in the east, and the Pacific is on the west coast! The sunsets, on the other hand, are spectacular (I don't know about proverbial...)

POSTED BY ellesie99 AT 04/21/06 1:23 PM

I have four-and-a-half words for you: "Knee-deep in the hoopla" from the crap-tastic Starship hit song "We Built This City."

POSTED BY smellface AT 04/21/06 1:51 PM

Pretty much any line from C&C Music Factory's "Things That Make You Go Hmm"

POSTED BY smellface AT 04/21/06 1:55 PM

We all know the "Milkshake Song" chorus from Kelis, but how about these lines from it... I can see you're on it, / You want me to teach thee / Techniques that freaks these boys, / It can't be bought, / Just know, thieves get caught, / Watch if your smart,

POSTED BY Veector AT 04/21/06 2:43 PM

Mark Morrison anyone? "Moan and Groan" off of Return of the Mack... But you gotta wet me up and wet me down / I can do it (down oh yeah) / Then you gotta dry me up with some foreplay / Any problem / I can solve it / Push it, work it, hurt it, all night, all night, all day

POSTED BY Veector AT 04/21/06 2:50 PM

I went to a party last Saturday night I didn't get laid, I got in a fight, Uh, huh It ain't no big thing -Lita Ford "Kiss Me Deadly"

POSTED BY Elizabeth R. AT 04/21/06 3:26 PM

The worst pedophile song is Benney Mardonis "Into the Night". "She's just sixteen years old Leave her alone, they say Separated by fools Who don't know what love is yet But I want you to know If I could fly I'd pick you up I'd take you into the night And show you a love like you've never seen Ever seen"

POSTED BY Elizabeth R. AT 04/21/06 3:53 PM

I know it's shooting fish in a barrel, but... Jessica Simpson's song "I think I'm in Love with You" contradicts itself in consecutive lines. I don't know what's gotten in to me/ But I kinda think I know what it is.

POSTED BY slavBone AT 04/21/06 4:12 PM

Muskrat Susie, Muskrat Sam Do the jitterbug out in muskrat land And they shimmy And Sammy's so skinny - Muskrat Love, Captain and Tennille

POSTED BY Judy AT 04/21/06 4:15 PM

what about Camron's "Get em girls" that song was awful, especially the ,"okie dokie/ hoky poky/ roly poly/rice-a-roni turn your ass around homie" line. I was very suprised there was no Kanye West or Destiny's Child

POSTED BY tnicholes AT 04/21/06 4:54 PM

How about the chorus from Neil Diamond's "I Am I Said?" "I am, I said, to no one there, and no one heard at all. NOT EVEN THE CHAIR." I didn't know it was so hard to find a lyric that rhymes with there. Guess I was wrong.

POSTED BY Siv Art AT 04/21/06 6:42 PM

Another 311 classc line from "Come Original" :A warning to the crews out there who think they're hot if you're not original rockers you will get shot -- end. Wow! I mean I'm a big fan, but come on. I think they are so embarrassed by those lyrics, that the first 2 place I went had them omitted. Yeah guys, might be a good to idea to forget about that one altogether.

POSTED BY Nobody beats the Wiz AT 04/21/06 9:32 PM

crazy town's "butterfly" "Such a sexy,sexy pretty little thing Fierce nipple pierce you got me sprung with your tongue ring and I ain't gonna lie cause your loving gets me high" "Hey sugar momma, come and dance with me The smartest thing you ever did was take a chance with me So, what ever tickles your fancy Girl it's you like Sid and Nancy" first, they probably wouldn't know a sex pistol's song if it came and slapped them in the face. second, these are truly the worst lyrics of all time. i win.

POSTED BY ariesjenna AT 04/21/06 9:43 PM

From the song "Sleepless" by Wave: "I'll tell you what it's like/It's something that can't be described." Umm...what was that?

POSTED BY vic_chick AT 04/22/06 1:40 AM

Gwen Stefani's Hollaback Girl. If not the chorus line of "I ain't no hollaback girl!" then of course we have, "This shit is bananas! B, a n a n a s!" Or anything by Mindless Self Indulgence. Most of their lyrics are so horrific I can't be bothered to repeat them, but try from their songs Faggot "I been denied all the best ultra sex!" or What Do They Know: "My tendency's never returned / Received like a big fat jerk / I been silly, but not absurd / Cuz you know that's what I heard."

POSTED BY f o x e AT 04/22/06 3:03 AM

Aw, man, somebody beat me to the "This Shit's bananas, b-a-n-a-n-a-s!" line! I had the misfortune to be stuck in a movie theater with half a dozen 10 year old boys singing to that on the movie preview video. I will never recover. I would also have to nominate "Against the wind" by Bob Seger. I mean, it's sooooo loooong and the same line over and over...we were eating in Taco Bell and my husband said "My god, are you still running against the wind?!" after about 5 minutes of pure agony. Also, anything by Michael McDonald. The man needs to get the mush out of his mouth and ENUNCIATE!!!

POSTED BY Ro AT 04/22/06 10:28 AM

"Slam Dunk Da Funk" by Five, I don't even know where to start.

POSTED BY obsessedwithsnl AT 04/22/06 11:22 AM

Speaking of pure agony . . . the worst lyrics ever goes to "Black Velvet" by Alannah Myles. It pains me to even type the words: "Black velvet and that little boy smile, Black velvet with that slow southern style, A new religion that'll bring you to your knees Black velvet if you please." Pardon me, I have to go throw up.

POSTED BY Tracy Utah AT 04/22/06 12:42 PM

Full lyric (tie): "In the Year 2525," Zager and Evans; "D.O.A.," Bloodrock (inarticulate flower-power fatalism/millennialism at its worst) A heavenly (?!) sample of each: "In the year 7510 If God's a-comin', he oughta make it by then. Maybe he'll look around himself and say. Guess it's time for the judgment day." "Life is flowing out my body Pain is flowing out with my blood The sheets are red and moist where I'm lying God in Heaven, teach me how to die" (repeat after me: "Man, that's HEAVY!!!") Chorus: "Kung Fu Fighting," Carl Douglas "Everybody was Kung Fu fighting, Those kids were fast as lightning In fact it was a little bit frightening, But they fought with expert timing" Title line (tie): "(Love Is) Thicker Than Water," Andy Gibb (uh, isn't EVERYTHING thicker than water?!) and, "In a Gadda Da Vida," Iron Butterfly (some humans have evolved a little more slowly than Adam and Eve, alas ...)

POSTED BY doxieman122 AT 04/22/06 2:14 PM

Worstest song lyrics goes to New Kids on the Block for "Tonight," a song that references all of their hits. "Remember when we said, girl, please don't go, and how I'd be loving you forever, taught you 'bout hangin' tough as long as you got the right stuff, didn't we, girls, ooh, didn't we, girls, aah?" You SURE did NKOTB, you dropped the knowledge hardcore. "Remember when we traveled round the world, there were a lot of people and girls, fan mail from everywhere showed us how you care, didn't it, girls, ooh, didn't it, girls, aah?" It SURE did NKOTB, It sure did represent the mad love we had for you.

POSTED BY Tuhcoolyuh AT 04/22/06 2:37 PM

I think the song is done by The Killers, and everyone knows it because it's so damned catchy, but so damned obnoxious. "I've got soul, but I'm not a soldier" over and over again. I got news for these guys, just because 'soldier' is pronounced with 'soul' in it, doesn't make for good lyrics.

POSTED BY Birdie Alaska AT 04/22/06 5:25 PM

The first bad line I thought of that's excluded from this story is Player's "Baby Come Back:" "Baby come back, any kind of fool could see/There was something in everything about you" And then there's Boston's "More Than a Feeling" with the line, "I turned on some music to start my day."

POSTED BY jonlester AT 04/22/06 7:33 PM

Agh! "It's getting hot in here/so take of all your clothes" Any time a room gets stuffy and somebody points it out, there's always a person bound to sing that song!

POSTED BY Parade AT 04/23/06 12:16 AM

And from Ashlee Simpson- "You make me wanna La La." That causes me physical pain.

POSTED BY Julia AT 04/23/06 12:58 AM

Yes, the "I've got soul but I'm not a soldier" is from the Killers. Any line from Vanilla Ice's "Ice, Ice Baby." "We make it hype and you want to step with this / Shay plays on the fade, slice like a ninja / Cut like a razor blade" or "Then I flow like a harpoon daily and nightly" I thought it was bad when I was a teen ager. I heard it again a couple years ago and laughed myself silly as I actually listened to all the words.

POSTED BY nightwind AT 04/23/06 12:56 PM

I have to nominate R. Kelly's Ignition Remix. I had been telling my friend Erin about its ridiculous lyrics for weeks. Then one fateful night I was driving her home and flipping through the stations when there it was. I almost deafened her when I screamed, "THIS IS IT!!!!!" We laughed so hard listening to it. Apparently the song sans remix wasn't good enough; he tweeked it just so and delivered this: It's the remix to ignition Hot and fresh out the kitchen Mama rollin that body got every man in here wishin Sippin on coke and rum I'm like so what I'm drunk... Then add in the "beep, beeps" and the "toot, toots" and you have a fucking masterpiece. Thanks R. Kelly for the memory. Thank you so much.

POSTED BY thewaitress AT 04/24/06 12:15 AM

Lots of good stuff here, but without a doubt the single worst song every written is from the Fletch soundtrack, called "Fletch, Get Outta Town" by Dan Hartman: Get outta town (get outta town) Just get outta town Go north to Alaska east to Atlantic City or south to Rio Almost as far as you can go Get outta town Just rent a car (get outta town) So they won't know where you are

POSTED BY cjb AT 04/24/06 2:26 PM

Ha! While we're talking soundtracks, how about Delbert McClendon from the "Groundhog Day" soundtrack - "I'm Your Weatherman." The lyrics in question (and I'm going from memory here) go something like "If precipitation is drowning all your plans / just call information up / ask for the weatherman"

POSTED BY R_Stewart AT 04/24/06 2:48 PM

I nominate "On My Own," sung by Michael McDonald and Patti LaBelle, written by Burt Bachrach and Carol Bayer Sager, for this verse: "So many promises Never should be spoken Now I know what loving you cost Now we’re up to talking divorce And we weren’t even married." What the heck does that look like, talking about divorce BEFORE you're married?

POSTED BY mds0725 AT 04/24/06 10:02 PM

Just because so many Steely Dan lyrics belong on "Best 100" lists, I nominate this gem (from "Kid Charlemagne") totally unworthy of Becker & Fagen: "is there gas in the car? yes there's gas in the car."

POSTED BY inked AT 04/25/06 9:15 AM

Glaring omission fellas: Jermaine Stewart's magnificent plea to all the slutty chicks: "We don't have to take our clothes off to have a good time, oh no. We can dance and party all night, and drink some cherry wine, uh huh." Now, I'm not a sommelier but I'm pretty sure wine is made from grapes, not cherries. Perhaps this could be the abstinence anthem for those right wingers/bible belt zombies who think they can stop teens from screwing. Sadly and ironically Jermaine didn't follow his own advice as he died from AIDS.

POSTED BY Mrs. Nick Drake AT 04/25/06 9:44 AM

With so many Nickelback and Creed songs to choose from, how did you narrow it down.

POSTED BY Kevin Dean Nicewanger AT 04/26/06 11:29 PM

Def Leppard, Pour Some Sugar On Me: "Step inside, walk this way / You and me babe, Hey, hey!" Guess it's tough finding something to rhyme with way. And then, "I'm hot, sticky sweet / From my head to my feet." it wasn't enough to parade around in earrings and frayed acid-washed jeans, you also had to cop to being a walking cumshot? Bryan Adams, Cuts Like A Knife: what the fuck else is it going to cut like? A spoon? A chainsaw? A machete? Mr. Blonde?

POSTED BY Kevin Dean Nicewanger AT 04/27/06 10:36 AM

What, no Van Hagar lyrics? "Just hangin' 'round the local parking lot / Checkin' out the girls see what they got / Yea they love it when me and the boys / Start playin' love with them human toys / Yea we just wind 'em up and let 'em go, oh yea" (Summer Nights) "You look at every face in a crowd / some shine and some keep you guessin’ / Waiting for someone to come into focus / Teach you your final love lesson" (When It's Love) And my personal favorite: "Only time will tell / If we stand the test of time" (Why Can't This Be Love)

POSTED BY ColonelTom AT 04/27/06 10:57 PM

Ahem. "You see me/ I've got my magic pie." Yes, Noel, we see you and, yes, that's...quite a pie.

POSTED BY mnelson AT 04/28/06 11:25 AM

(The above, of course, is "Magic Pie," the Noel-sung cut and arguable nadir of Oasis' third album, Be Here Now.)

POSTED BY mnelson AT 04/28/06 12:58 PM

The Red Hot Chili Peppers song - I forget the title, but you all know it. "I know, I know, for sure .. ding ding dang ding ding ding don ding don dang ...". Funny cause their attitude is probably 'That's great! Just leave that, don't even try to come up with another stanza!" Still annoys me, tho.

POSTED BY Spradlinnn' AT 04/30/06 1:44 PM

Social Distortion- "Reach for the sky" "I find myself now thinking twice, I never thought about no future, its just the roll of the dice." and "You can run you can hide, just like Bonnie and Clyde" I was just listening to this song and thought the lyrics were awful.

POSTED BY obsessedwithsnl AT 04/30/06 7:13 PM

Hawthorne Heights, Ohio Is For Lovers. "Because you kill me. You know you do, you kill me well. You like it too, and I can tell. You never stop until my final breath is gone." Urk. Could this BE more clichéd? Hawthorne Heights, Decembers 'You don't even have to speak because I can hear your heartbeat Fluttering like butterflies searching for a drink.' Oh, come ON! That's a terrible analogy, a really weird stupid twist on a common cliche. Grrr. And to finish... 'Please slow down girl We're moving way too fast for their world We gotta make this last.' I believe the Spice Girls used these lyrics a few years before you. The only difference was that everyone liked them and only Jesus likes you. Bad luck, Hawthorne Heights. Next time, just throw the album and yourselves off a cliff. It's better for your fans in the long run.

POSTED BY Lime_Stone AT 05/01/06 4:58 AM

What about ANYTHING by CAM'RON and D*ckset(Dipset) Get em girls-"I get computers PUTIN', I tutor the students. Killa Cam-"Canary Burgundy, I call it Lemon Red, yellow diamonds in my ear call em lemon heads. lemon head end up dead, ice like winnegpeg, gemstone, flinstone, you can say im friends with fred. You want happy scrappy? I got Pataki Yaki, chicks say Im tacky daddy range look like laffy taffy. There are lots more, but that would mean I would have to put lyrics to all of his and dipsets albums on here

POSTED BY LoveMusic AT 05/02/06 1:59 AM

I dont know who made this song but its an old school song I will love you forever, until the 12th of never. so lame.

POSTED BY LoveMusic AT 05/02/06 2:00 AM

The entire song "One Week", by the Barenaked Ladies. For example: "Chickity china the chinese chicken You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin Watchin x-files with no lights on, were dans la maison I hope the smoking mans in this one Like harrison ford Im getting frantic Like sting Im tantric Like snickers, guaranteed to satisfy Like kurasawa I make mad films Okay I dont make films But if I did theyd have a samurai Gonna get a set of better clubs Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs just so my Irons arent always flying off the back-swing Gotta get in tune with sailor moon Cause that cartoon has got the boom anime babes That make me think the wrong thing"

POSTED BY Lolo AT 05/29/06 1:54 PM