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Rock and roles

Scissorfight star in their greatest epic yet
By JAMES PARKER  |  March 22, 2006

CAPE CRUSADER: It's hard to avoid the image of Ironlung as a sort of rogue satellite to the band, beaming in his transmissions from his home on the Outer Cape.Late March, 2005, Allston: Ironlung is in the parking lot of Mad Oak Studios, a large man stranded in the midafternoon, wearing flip-flops, standing in a desert of cigarette butts, asphalt, despair. His eyes are whirling. His beard has the look of a destroyed mattress. Next to him is Andrew Schneider, the producer, equally gray-faced and smoke-saturated. These are the dregs of the Jaggernaut sessions, after days of sleeplessness and work. Drums, bass and guitar have all been recorded; it remains only for Ironlung to lay down his vocals and Scissorfight’s fifth full-length album will approach completion. But there’s a problem — it’s this track “Dynamite” — the outro needs something — and he’s run out of words . . .

Back inside the studio, a big dozy pitbull called Brady, later credited in the CD liner notes as “sonic consultant,” is infusing the couch with bored-dog smell. Drinks are taken, and Ironlung starts pacing, nodding and mumbling a half-finished verse: “Who’s got the dynamite . . . who wants to fucking go . . . TNT . . . insanity . . . ” (His lyrics are often in this vein — a sort of grand surrealistic menacing.) He brandishes an A4 pad of notes: scrawled images, threats and slogans, in upper case. “CLOSE QUARTERS HUNTING . . . FLORIDA PANTHERS HAVE NO TESTICLES.” One phrase seems to suggest itself: “THE GONG OF LUNACY.” It has a ring to it, an appropriateness. It also rhymes with “TNT.” Brady the pitbull shifts on the couch, sending up another waft of canine ennui. Ironlung begins to rant: “Who’s got the TNT? . . . the gong of luna-cy. . . who’s gonna pass the flame?” Schneider watches him carefully. “So,” he at last suggests, “shall we do it?”

One year later almost to the day, Scissorfight’s singer/lyricist is on the phone from his home on the Outer Cape, contemplating an early-morning fog bank that has gathered offshore and speaking through the mellow cycles of his breakfast cigarette. “What you saw in the studio that time, it’s not all that pretty, is it? You see there’s a man there that’s struggling with something, but that’s the way it is. In that process a vibration or an atmosphere is created. I mean, with me and Andrew, that was me being Klaus Kinski to his Werner Herzog. I’m playing my role and he’s doing his, there’s a chemical thing going on, and you obviously can’t do that unless you know each other pretty well. Andrew . . . he guides, he endures, you know? Ha!”

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The gong of lunacy
Five all-time Scissorfight classics

1 | “Planet of Ass,” from Guaranteed Kill (Wonderdrug, 1996): “Ass, ass, ass/ Planet of Ass!” The anthem. A reasonably orderly pit can devolve into a shamanistic pigpile when they play this one. 

Scissorfight, "Planet of Ass" (mp3)

2 | “Drunken Hangman,” from Balls Deep (Wonderdrug, 1997): “Goddamn that drunken hangman/He gets respect . . . ” Ironlung sinks another one and fondles his rope.

Scissorfight, "Drunken Hangman" (mp3)

3 | “Granite State Destroyer,” from New Hampshire (Tortuga, 2000): “Weed guns and axes/We don’t pay our taxes . . . ” The ’Fight fire off a volley from the compound fence.

Scissorfight, "Granite State Destroyer (mp3)

4 | “The Most Dangerous Animal Is Me," from Mantrapping for Sport and Profit (Hydrahead, 2001): “You feel the evil comin’ down . . . ” Lurching like a wounded mammoth through the pine barrens of Cape Cod, Ironlung grows afraid of himself. 

Scissorfight, "The Most Dangerous Animal Is Me" (mp3)

5 | “Victory over Horseshit,” from Jaggernaut (Hydrahead, 2006): “Blast from the past/The Governor of Mass can fucking kiss my ass!” As Ironlung explains, “Mitt Romney sucks, and the average citizen does not get the opportunity to voice his opinion to the Man. But I do.”

Scissorfight, "Victory over Horseshit" (mp3)

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